David enjoying some giant Cheetos

So Chester Cheetah apparently ratcheted up the Cheeto mold over in good old Frito-Lay central, Plano, Texas and cranked out some new Cheetos the size of large marshmallows — you know, the ones you used to make smores with.  It’s hardly healthy, nor am I proud of the fact that the picture to the left even exists lest our pediatrician Dr. Kate gets wind of it and… there goes my pediatrics evaluation.  To justify my cause however, I must protest to the fact that Gerber gets away with marketing essentially the same garbage – Gerber Graduates Lil’ Crunchies, which is over twice the price by weight, has little added nutritional benefit, and somehow has weaseled its way into becoming a healthy snack for babies.  No, I’d be the irresponsible, deplorable, repulsive father for letting my child stuff his face with Giant Cheetos, but not so much so if I let him tote around “Gerber Graduates Lil’ Cruchies.”  I might as well be feeding my children starch packing peanuts (I know you’ve tried one before… and if you haven’t its probably because you’ve never received a giant box full of ghost white Cheetos before, and if you have and it came out of your mouth again what you got wasn’t the starch packing peanuts, but the polystyrene ones — in which case you probably shouldn’t be putting them in your mouth in the first place).  So, in essence the moral of this story is plenti-fold:

1. Why buy Cheetos when you can get flavorless starch packing peanuts for a lot less and then you can even go to the movie theater with them and shake on the funny popcorn flavoring MSG powders to create your own Cheeto varieties.
2. Why feed your children Gerber garbage when you can feed them Cheetos starch packing peanuts for a lot less, and in a lot greater flavor variety (see 1.)
3. The only rational lesson that we can discern:  There is a high demand industry that needs to begin in: Giant starch packing peanuts

Dan
- Rationally Irrational

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